May 2011
19 posts
May 28th
22 notes
12 Words
The other day in that nerd comic xkcd there was a tip that said if you look up any Wikipedia article and click the first word in the entry that is either not in italics or in parenthesis, you will always end up at the entry for “Philosophy.” It works. I did it several times using the most random of words, some of them pornographic or related to Batman, neither of which have to do with...
May 27th
23 notes
ListenI found audio of Arnold Schwarzenegger confessing...
May 25th
9 notes
“To put it in perspective, I have a seven-and-half-year-old son. He wasn’t even...”
– Virginia film office location manager Andy Edmunds, on the length of time it took to woo Steven Spielberg to the state to film the upcoming Abe Lincoln biopic Lincoln. I’m pretty excited to have this movie getting made in my backyard (literally Steven Spielberg - I call him Steve - came over...
May 24th
28 notes
May 23rd
13 notes
May 22nd
6 notes
May 20th
6 notes
Lincolning Around
One of my top-tier mancrushes, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, is going to be filming the upcoming Steven Spielberg film Lincoln in my hometown starting this fall. He plays the part of Abraham Lincoln’s brother whose name I don’t know so we’ll just call him Barry. This also means my chance of actually having beers with one of my top-tier mancrushes and discussing our (presumed) mutual love...
May 18th
24 notes
Meat Loaf
I walk a fine line between guilty pleasure and a strong desire to perform a dramatic interpretation of Bat out of Hell in front of thousands. In my mind, a pair of black archangel wings are strapped to my back. At the very least, I’d be wearing a leather jacket and I’d definitely do several of those dramatic fist things throughout the 46 minute and 33 second performance, which would be sold out...
May 17th
15 notes
Me, to Taquita, our Taxi Driver
Me: Taquita?
Taquita, our Taxi Driver: Yes?
Me: Nothing. Just wanted to say your name.
May 16th
21 notes
May 15th
25 notes
May 14th
23 notes
Movies I Do Not Watch
RULE: If a movie has a man wearing a top hat in it - or takes place before a period when top hats were popular - I will not like it. They’re all just old and boring. Though, now that I think about it, I did like True Grit, so you got me on that. And the one with Batman and Wolverine as magicians had a pretty good plot twist in it, so that too. And actually, now that I more deeply consider my...
May 13th
19 notes
1 tag
May 12th
22 notes
Crib Destruction
We shot a commercial today and it required a baby crib, only a baby crib chopped up into a lot of pieces. Why we had to chop it up into a lot of pieces doesn’t really matter to this story and don’t worry, no babies were harmed too badly. We bought the crib off craigslist (cribslist?) from a woman who didn’t need it anymore because her three children have graduated to big-girl...
May 11th
21 notes
Street Talk
Panhandler: (yelling from afar) "Yo young man can I talk to you for a minute?"
Me: "No, sorry."
Panhandler: "You're sorry? You don't even know what I want."
Me: "I have a general idea."
May 9th
30 notes
WatchWatch
This magician outside of Wrigley Field makes David Blaine look like a pussy.
May 7th
17 notes
May 6th
19 notes
“I’m glad we got him. He’s the one who was behind the whole World...”
– an “area resident” quoted in today’s newspaper. Isn’t reading the paper supposed to make you smarter?
May 2nd
26 notes